Holy House?

This past week was my birthday (yay!) and we had a few friends over for dinner.  It wound up being four of my closest gal pals, two of their male counterparts (one husband, one long time boyfriend), and one toddler.  Totally a fun group, and a group which would normally not be together around my table.  Totally what I wanted for my birthday – a nice casual dinner with some good friends and good food. I mean, how can you go wrong with homemade fish tacos and margaritas, especially when you add in margarita cupcakes for dessert?

At one point during dinner, I noticed that both of the guys (other than my dear husband) had at some point since walking into my house put on kippot.  While, I am used to sitting at a table with them wearing kippot – it would normally be for a chag or Shabbat meal.  This was Wednesday night.

I know neither of them walked into my house wearing a kippah, that is just outside of their daily life, yet the kippot they were each wearing were ones they normally wear for religious occasions.  This means they each thought to bring a kippah with them to my birthday dinner.

Does my apartment exude such a level of holiness that these guys felt compelled to wear a kippah to sit at my table? Was it out of respect for us? Did it just feel like the thing to do? I don’t get it, and just didn’t know how to ask.

So dear readers, have any ideas why a man who does not wear a kippah on a regular basis would come to a friend’s house for dinner with one in his pocket, ready to put on when he sat down at the table?

 

{Obviously anything we come up with is pure speculation, but I just had to throw it out there because what good is having  a blog if you can’t talk about these oddities.}

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7 thoughts on “Holy House?

  1. Ever since my husband started rabbinical school and eventually finished and became a rabbi, people have treated me, him, our home differently. Only our closest (and I mean SUPER CLOSET) friends still treat us the same. Even my non-Jewish friends who knew me way before I met my rabbi husband treat me a little differently now.

    I think they definitely feel that all three things (you, him, home) now because of our husband’s jobs represent a certain kind of holiness. I feel bad because I want people to just be themselves but I think they do it out of respect for our customs. I don’t espouse a holier-than-thou attitude and I’d rather than they take on mitzvot because they genuinely want to do them, not because they worry I will think less of them.

  2. If your husband was wearing a kippah at home, then I would say your friends were following the minhag hamakom in putting on a kippah. It sounds like they were being respectful. Your blog is about changing your life to fit your image of a rabbi’s wife. Your friends have responded to that. Of course they treat you differently than they used to – you have deliberately changed.

    • I have to respectfully disagree Barry. I don’t think we’re changing to fit the image, I think we’re trying to change the image to fit with us. Yes, there are some small changes to us along the way – but those are the exceptions (at least as I see my own life).
      Even if it were the case, Dustin has worn a kippah full-time as long as any of these friends have known him and we haven’t noticed them donning kippot for casual meals before.

  3. Might just be out of habit. When these friends come to your house, they are usually coming for a religious occasion, and they might have just been on autopilot.

    Did the women come in skirts? Do they usually come in skirts when they’re at your house for a holiday? That might help you figure out what your friends think of you (other than your awesomeness :D).

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