There is Pain and There is Joy

I’ve been trying to write about the budget tips we’ve learned in New York since Wednesday(which are numerous and interesting, at least in my opinion) but my mind keeps wandering and when that happens, I’ve been moving on to other projects. I couldn’t figure out what was going on until I read a friend’s status message on facebook.

It’s been kind of a rough week – R & I are still adjusting to a very different schedule. This is more different, I think, than at any point in our relationship up until now. To go from last year where it was the most similar to the most different is a pretty big shift, even if we did have six or eight weeks of transition. Things that don’t seem like a big deal become a bigger deal. That’s just the way these things work. For now, we’re back on track and looking forward to celebrating R’s birthday on Sunday, plus heading back home for Rosh Hashanah since R is leading services for the Hillel.

So, with that background, I have seen both the most uplifting joy and heartcrushing pain come to friends around me. Divorce, serious marital trouble, health problems, and the thing that prompted this message – an old friend is burying her sister today, who died by her own hand. This friend was the one who helped me get involved in Hillel almost 9 years ago – by sending me a thank you note for helping her lead an event that made me feel appreciated and welcomed. I found that note when we were moving and sent her a note about it – and now this event that breaks my heart for her.

As is true in life though, there is joy. Another friend from the interwebs found out that she is incredibly unexpectedly pregnant. After failed attempt after failed attempt at pregnancy, she finally had a baby using IVF – and as they were about to start again to attempt a sibling – she found out she was pregnant. And it seems to be sticking! And the joys of everyday things, from discovering lovely Rosh Hashanah videos (my favorite is Ein Prat Fountainhead’s Dip Your Apple versus the more popular Maccabeats Good Life) to making progress through the ever shifting pile of things to do.

Just something going through my head as we are plowing along in this season of introspection.


One thought on “There is Pain and There is Joy

  1. The 12-hour yeshiva day was really hard for both of us to get used to. Especially since at the same time, I was working full-time, doing a Master’s twice a week at night and all sorts of other things in-line with my overachiever lifestyle. 🙂 But I think it’s good practice if your husband becomes a pulpit rabbi. So many of my friends who are pulpit rabbis have off in the middle of the week on the strangest days to spend time with their families because Shabbos is now a work day. I know some pulpit rabbis who never have an official day off. Forget whether that’s legal or not for a second, I think it’s a choice in this one case I’m thinking about but there’s always something having a bris, having a funeral, shiva, etc., and I think it teaches you to make time when you have it and that time together is really precious.

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